Date Everything! Is a Dating Sim That Does What It Says on the Tin

Publisher Team17 and developer Sassy Chap Games have announced Date Everything!, a dating sim where the studios claim you can, in fact, date everything.

According to a press release, the game “whisks players off into a world where everyday objects transform into romantic possibilities”. If you’ve ever found yourself idly wishing you could romance your laundry basket, your vacuum cleaner, or even the very air you breathe, this is the game for you.

With the help of special “Dateviator” (surely that should be Avidater?) glasses, you’ll chat up everyday objects around your home to see if any of them spark joy, so to speak.

The possibilities for jokes here are endless.

Date Everything! is being made by Sassy Chap Games, a new studio formed by “a group of well-recognized voice actors” like Final Fantasy XV‘s Ray Chase and Persona 5‘s Max Mittelman, among others.

As such, the game will feature 100 “fully voiced datable characters”, as well as branching dialogue with multiple endings for each character.

Sassy Chap says that each romance path will have three potential outcomes, Love, Friend, or Hate, and each one will lead to a different resolution, which creates what the studio calls “an endless panoply of playthroughs”.

You can check out the debut trailer for Date Everything! right here. It’ll give you a good idea of what you’re in for, as well as which of your suddenly-not-inanimate waifus and husbandos you’d like to romance.

All of the characters mentioned above will have their own themes, and more than 11,000 hand-drawn images will bring them and their environments to life.

You’ll also be able to fully interact with a 3D overworld that will change based on the choices you make throughout your run, so it won’t just be the kind of static visual novel you might be used to from the dating sim world.

Date Everything! doesn’t have a release date yet, but when it lands, it’ll arrive on PC, PlayStation 5, Xbox Series X|S, and Nintendo Switch. If you’re a fan of games like Hooked on You, then you owe it to yourself to keep an eye on this one.